I Thought This Was It

Today we said goodbye to our family here in San Carlos. I told them that most likely I would not be coming back for Christmas and instead choose to remain in Cebu until my final deparature on January 1. In the 17 months here in the Philippines, we managed to visit San Carlos a total of six times, including attending the funeral of my Auntie Beth, whom all of us miss deeply.

Traveling here in the Philippines has its hazards. For instance, there are no child safety seats. I have not seen one here. Most taxis don’t even have seat belts, despite the sign in the front that says “Fasten your seat belts.”

The question “Will we all fit” is a ridiculous question. Filipinos will always find a way to fit any number of passengers into a finite space of transportation. I’ve seen entire clans (dozen plus) in a pedi-cab (motorcycle with a side car) and entire families (five plus) on a motorbike. Yesterday, we rented out a jeepney and transported an unknown number of the Bermejo clan to the pool resort. I don’t know how many were in the jeepney, but I do know i paid the entrance fee of 75 family members at the gate at the end of day.

The Philippines has also suffered some pretty disastrous ferry or boat tragedies. When we took a family trip to Camotes Islands earlier this year, we took a large pumpboat (basically a boat powered by a lawnmower engine - seriously they pulled a large rope to start it). I remember when our trip started and seeing the waves, and although they were not large or particularly threatening, I had this thought about the whole boat sinking, and actually a sense of relief that if this was going to be the last day of my life, I would be with Megumi and the kids and we would go together. I was not afraid to die in that particular moment, and in a very strange way, wish it would have been our time. All was well because we were together.
Upon arriving on the island of Cebu, we arranged to have a taxi come and pick us up at the port and take us back into the city. This trip usually takes almost two hours, and usually I'm able to relax.

Not tonight. I knew the hazards of this road especially during nightime. The road curves, vehicles eager to pass slower vehicles on the two lane highway. Large buses loaded with passenger, apparently with little regard for their safety, take on high speed risks and dangerous maneuevers. The taxi driver asked me to fasten my seat belt (which actually worked), but I refused, knowing that none of my family could do the same in the back seat. On two occasions, our driver attempted to pass a slower moving car, only to face another oncoming bus or truck in the other lane. Both times, I thought we were going to see Jesus. During one of these attempts, we were actually in the middle part of the highway, unable to pass the vehicle on our side and the bus barely missing us by moving towards the edge of their lane. Megumi and the kids were too busy talking and not paying attention to the road to realize how close they were to seeing their Lord.

I was fearful yet at peace, knowing the impact would have certainly been fatal and instant. In a blink of an eye, oncoming headlights and perhaps a terrified scream, would turn into Heavenly Lights with shouts of joy.

I have no idea how I'm going to die. But if I could choose a way to leave, it would have liked to have died tonight. Together with Megumi and the kids - in a blink of an eye. Instead, we arrived home safely unscathed, barely aware how close He was in saving us or calling us.